“Hey it’s, Thursday! What are you doing? Nothing? Can I come? No? Cool!”

I’ve spent the entire day thinking it’s Wednesday when it’s actually Thursday. Yesterday I thought it was Tuesday when it was really Wednesday. As I approach the end of this workday, I keep thinking, “Hmmmm… two more days of this shit. God, this week is going slowly.”

Then I remember that I’m an idiot and that I only have a half day tomorrow since I work until 6:00 every other night, and I get all happy with my retardo self. Miller Time for E Dagger!

This almost never happens, and in fact always seems to happen the other way. You’ll find yourself thinking it’s Wednesday when it’s really only Tuesday which REALLY makes the week drag on.

Having my experience this week is like thinking you already opened all your Christmas presents and then finding one hidden behind some gaudy, golden spray paint-covered macaroni ornament monstrosity you made in first grade. You swore this gift just appeared out of nowhere – but really your powers of observation are just terrible. You think you’re in for a couple more days of agonizingly boring monotony, but really you just can’t pay attention to your calendar.

The next time this happens to you, make sure and smile. Because god knows it won’t happen again and you’ll end up like Lady E calling me one tragic Monday at 11:00 a.m. “It feels like Friday.”

Wow, good luck with your week there, darlin’.

I’ll see you all next week. If you need me, I’ll be off drinking because it’s not actually Wednesday and I only have a half day tomorrow. Ha! Love it!

edagger@crujonessociety.com

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