Cru Jones Society

 

Welcome to another Happy Friday. Dagger’s off enjoying the sun, sea, and his new wife and left Hart in complete control of the helm. This means there are fewer links than normal, but all the fun is still here. This week we’ve got hockey, Mongolians, and Hall and Oats, you read that right, we got both Hall and Oats. But before we get to all of that, what do you guys really think of Dagger?

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Our beloved Rockies have been eliminated from the post season and three of the remaining teams we straight up hate. So for those who always skim past our baseball section can rejoice over knowing there will not be a baseball section for awhile.

However, there will be a hockey section. And that’s what this section is. Even if you’re not a hockey fan you’ll still enjoy and respect this nine year old. For those who watched the Al-Star Skills Challenge last year, and I’m sure that was a lot of you, will notice that this kid was watching especially close. In another 9 years, this kid will be in the pros.

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In other hockey news it was this week twenty years ago when Gretzky scored the goal to overtake the points record, thus earning him the moniker of the Great One. During the past twenty years nobody has even come close to making that record theirs. This is also probably the reason he was picked to join Jordan and Jackson as a ProStar.

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From the world of hockey to the world of science. Scientists are one step closer to a way to suspend life. By the way, I would love to be a scientist just so when people ask what I did for a living you could just say, “I’m a scientist.” It just reminds me of being a little kid and wanting to be a cowboy when you grow, just sort of all encompassing. Or just to have a business card that read Lee S. Hart: Scientist. But I digress. Using poisonous gasses, scientist have found a way to keep a rat alive but in a state of suspended animation. They hope to further develop this technology and understanding to aid the medical field in fighting certain diseases and helping people not suffer while they seek drawn out medical procedures. Now there’s a real hope of freezing yourself until a cure for bonitis is found.

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Remember those days of drinking down by the local river then stumbling into your high school home-coming game drunker than an Irishman? Or tossing back a few to take the edge off before attending one of those high pressure awkward school dances? Well one school in Springfield, Massachusetts, or as we like to think of it, Nazi Germany, will require students to take a breathalyzer test before attending such functions. High school is important for learning the skills we will use in life, this includes the skill of dealing with authority figures while intoxicated.

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Years ago China built a wall to keep the Mongolians out. Looking for another way into China the Mongolians must have started heading west, then like a lot of people do, they got to Colorado and saw how awesome it is and decided to stick around. Perhaps this needs more clarification. Colorado has one of the largest Mongolian populations outside of Mongolia. Now knowing that it only makes sense that the Denver Museum of Nature and Science is getting an exhibit on Genghis Khan. I am excited, as you may recall he was the historical tyrant I chose to be when the question was posed for a Monday Confessional.

Speaking of Monday Confessional, we have a new question for you. This week we want to know who you would take on in a fight? Not just a single punch in the face, but someone you would like to go a few rounds with. It can be anyone living, dead, or fictional. Send an email to staff@crujonessociety.com with your response and we will run it by the governing bodies and fight commissions and get your fight ready for Pay-Per-View. Or we’ll just post the answers up on Monday.

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The link you have all been waiting for, Hall and Oats. CNN has a fun little piece chronicling their career and influences, amongst other things. What we really enjoyed was finding out the duo met after a gang fight broke out. Never in a million years would we have associated these two with gangs, except maybe the Sharks and Jets.

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Who’s ready for some football? Either way we have some for ya. First off we to mention a new children’s story written by defensive tackle Remi Ayodele called “Tubbo Makes A Touchdown.” Read all about the book, then be sure to read it to your children to let them know they can do anything.

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Now the best link we have seen all week. A few times we have shared this picture with you. Now we have 83 pictures from an actual game. We have got to make sure to get tickets to the next game. Also we do not want to see the cheerleaders for this league.

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This week’s demotivator is dedicated to our happy newlyweds, because I couldn’t find a proper way to work this into the toast.

See ya next week everyone.

lee.s.hart@crujonessociety.com