Cru Jones Society

Welcome to the first ever edition of CJS Fact or Fiction. We ripped off this format from 411mania.com’s various sections, who, in turn, had ripped off an old Sportscenter segment that no longer airs. It’s the internet. Plagiarism~! Woo hoo!

To celebrate the inaugural CJS Fact or Fiction (as well as excuse to get cockeyed drunk – St. Patrick’s Day), your heralded CJS founders E Dagger and Lee S. Hart tackle six statements regarding alcohol consumption. Can a man drink a mojito with confidence? Who’s more annoying: beer snobs or wine snobs? Do margaritas actually suck? These questions and more await in our brand new CJS feature.

Pour the drinks, and let’s get started! Continue Reading »

One of the favorite pastimes around CJS is partaking in a drink or several, as it has been well documented. We know we are not alone in this past time, and we are always curious about your drinking habits. And with all the choices of drinks out there these days, we asked: What are you drinking right now? Obviously not at this moment, unless you’re on vacation or have the most awesome job ever; but currently when you do have a drink what you ordering? We’ve got the first round and the following ones are on our readers. Continue Reading »

The annual CJS rendezvous was one society member shy as Hart had obligations that prohibited him from making the usually splendid trip. And while Dagger, Lady E, and Senor Limon were living it up without a care in the world, Hart was stuck in his craptacular routine. We decided to use today to share memories from the trip. Hart has supplied us with a comparison about his weekend to allow us to fully appreciate a good vacation. Continue Reading »

The month of March usually means the annual CJS rendezvous in Tucson, unfortunately one of us couldn’t make it this year. But it did get us thinking about the places we visit every year without fail. And that got us wondering where some of your annual trips take you. So we asked: Where is one place you visit every year without fail? We received some great responses that take us all across the country. So grab your bags and let’s go! Continue Reading »

We say a fond farewell to the Olympics here at the Cru Jones Society for two reasons: 1) For two weeks every other year, the country comes together and watches the same thing allowing for collective conversation unparalleled in the dry desert of fractured experience that happens in the interim; and 2) Generating daily content that everyone can relate to for two weeks is ridiculously easy. We’ll miss that.

Thankfully, right on the heels of these enormously entertaining Olympics is the cultural juggernaut known as the Oscars. Vacuous, petty, borderline evil people will debate about which celebrities looked worst on the red carpet while the film industry gives itself a big fat self blowjob on national television for all the great work it’s done this year (All About Steve notwithstanding).  So, to kick your anticipation into high gear, we asked you to look back at Academy Award history and share with us: What is your favorite Best Picture recipient of all-time? We got outstanding turnout in this week’s Confessional, so let’s not delay any further. Here are your picks for the best of the best. Continue Reading »

We mentioned when we started our Olympic coverage that if you had something interesting about the Olympic you would to share to drop us a line. We are now happy to present to you an article from one of our readers who took us up on our offer. Please enjoy our special guest columnist, CJS regular Corriander.

Tight pants?  There are no tight pants in snowboarding!

Uniform styles have always been a hot topic in all sports and the Olympics are no exception.  There was a ton of attention directed at Michael Phelps’ new Speedo at the Beijing games.  Now we have our own controversies for the Vancouver games and some of them are just ridiculous.  Think that they have something to do with new technology (like the Speedo) or with competitive advantage?  If so, you are wrong. Continue Reading »

We remain balls deep in Olympics coverage here at CJS, and the time has rolled around again for your involvement. Last week we asked you about your favorite Olympic events, so this week we changed it up and asked: What Olympic event always seems like a good idea, but ends up disappointing you?

Think of this question as the once every four years cousin to making microwave popcorn, watching “The Soup,” or checking out Japanese porn – y’know, just to change it up for once – you think you’re going to have a great time, but just walk away unhappy, dissatisfied, and/or disgusted. Our answers are below, yours below that, and the slackasses who join us in the comments section all the way at the bottom.

So let’s make like we’re all virgins again and get disappointed. Only this time, we won’t have any sticky mess to clean up and we’ll be surrounded by awkward European people. What are we waiting for? Continue Reading »

Welcome to the kickoff of your CJS Olympics coverage. Two years ago, we rocked the site with coverage of the Beijing games, and we’re going to do the same this year. Check out the bottom of this Confessional to see how you can get in on the fun. But for now, let’s get to the topic at hand, and the perfect way to begin our Olympic coverage: What event are you most looking forward to and why?

So enjoy the opening ceremonies, and stay tuned for two full weeks of Olympic goodness. Continue Reading »

Please welcome to the Cru Jones Society, the beautfiul, talented, highly acerbic, Redhead herself, Ms. Erika Napoletano. Please give her lots of love in the comments section, and do yourself a favor by checking out all of her excellent work which she lists at the bottom of this post.

Jesus Christ – is it really Valentine’s Day again?

I hate Valentine’s Day. Haaaaaates it, preeeeecious. In my humble opinion, it’s the most ridiculous pseudo-holiday in existence (right behind Administrative Assistant’s Day… seriously). We clamor for dinner reservations and bitch, whine, moan and complain when our true-love-du-jour fails to deliver the one thing we so desperately wanted (which is inevitably the one thing we never told them we wanted but expected them to read our minds and figure out). In all honesty, V-Day is nothing more than a clearance sale for Christmas under a different name. Sure, the candy’s all heart-shaped, but the wrapping paper is still red. There’s still a chubby superhero mascot, but instead of an old fat guy who likes to play with midgets, it’s a violent cherub toting a bow and arrow. Yeah, yeah, we know “love hurts,” but do you really have to shoot me in the ass each year and remind me?

So guys, sit down. The Redhead speaks. We all know Valentine’s Day is ridiculous. I’m going to give you eight girl-proof tips for avoiding coming off as a total douchebag to your sweetie. Not everyone will approve of my tactics and it’s possible I’m going to pioneer reverse misogyny, but fuck it. I’m tired of the whiny broads that make the rest of us look bad. This one’s for you, guys. Continue Reading »

We’re just under a week away from national date night, also known as Valentine’s Day. But before we can celebrate with that special someone, we have pre Valentine’s stuff to deal with, make reservations, order flowers, cancel the mistress, and get the heart shape boxed of chocolates. And to make sure all that stuff doesn’t kill your spirit we have a whole Valentine’s themed week for you, complete with a special guest column. We’re start this love-dovey week with a look back at past dates. So we wanted to know: What was something unexpectedly awesome that happened to you on a date? The lights are dim, the music is sultry, and the champagne is on ice now let’s get this date started. Continue Reading »

This week signals part one of a four part feature we will be doing throughout the year. We love movies, and we watch a lot of them, and we feel there are several we love that do not get the proper respect. So for four weeks throughout the year we will talk about twelve movies, three each week, we feel are underrated.

To kick off this new segment we looked to you, our loyal readers. And the best way to do that was with the Monday Confessional. We asked you: What movie do you think is underrated? As usual ours are first, and we picked a couple we talked about before that didn’t warrant a whole post. Then we move on to the wide variety of responses we got from you guys. Continue Reading »

Please welcome CJS Regular Chaddymac to the Cru Jones Society. He won last year’s Food, Sex, or Cars competition, and this is his article. Tying into our WWE-themed week, here is Chaddymac’s Top 5 Entrance Themes of All-Time. Give him a big CJS welcome!

I’m going to be upfront with all of you right now. I’m an engineer, not a writer, so I apologize for the step by step process that is about to follow but that is how my brain works.  When I set out to write this article, I had 2 entrance songs in mind that I had to include in my Top 5. That means I had to search my memory, since a top 5 wouldn’t be very good with only 2, and I haven’t watched wrestling in 6 years, which was coincidentally around the same time I got married (funny, huh?). 

So I went back to freshman year of college, when every Monday and Thursday Dagger would come over to Limon’s and my dorm room where we would watch RAW and Smackdown.  Once I was in the right frame of mind, I started spouting off wrestlers and with YouTube in front of me, proceeded to watch and listen to every one of their entrances.  Continue Reading »

Welcome to Raw is Cru Jones Society! We are very excited this week as we pay a tribute to something that was a big part of our lives, professional wrestling. It could even be said pro wrestling is responsible for CJS as Dagger and Hart first became friends over our love of sports entertainment. So we have a week of great articles dedicated to this form of entertainment, including a guest column from Food, Sex, or Cars? winner Chaddymac. Be sure to look for that one on Wednesday.

We start this week by getting a feel of your wrestling love, and to do that we asked you the question: Who was your favorite wrestler? We assumed that at some point in your life you watched some wrestling and had a guy you rooted for above all else. And you proved us right by sending in some great responses. As is the custom we’ll jerk the curtain and then your responses will follow. Continue Reading »

Today’s guest post comes from Brad, who, along with a cast of disturbed characters, writes at the sometimes gross, often offensive, always hilarious Spherx’s Domain as extra-terrestrial columnist and namesake Spherx. He likes to unwind watching short videos produced by his talented colleagues at Nebulus Visions Multimedia, who strive to inspire and promote creativity through art. He also enjoys popping open iTunes to check out their Nebcast, where they tackle a variety of subjects, but mostly focus on movies. For now, he answers the question: What would happen ”If Brad Had a Robot”?

So, I was skateboarding to school today when I stopped off at my crazy scientist friend’s lab for guitar practice. Usually he’s not home in the morning and, to my surprise, today he was – busily working on some new experiment. When I asked him what he was up to, he replied by asking me, “Brad, if you could have any robot in the world, what kind of robot would that be?” Continue Reading »

Confessional time again, and we asked you to play God. Unfortunately, no one seemed terribly interested in playing, so we’re a bit light once again. We suspect last week’s question (What song makes its way onto your mixtapes most often?) and this week’s question: “You get to make a superchild for any reason. Which two people do you take DNA from to make this kid?” are just a tad abstract and since you likely have plenty to do, pondering the DNA of a hypothetical child isn’t exactly high on your list of priorities. So next week’s topic is much more straightforward. Check it out at the bottom.

But first, let’s take a look at some superchildren. We had fun with this, and we hope you do too. So welcome to the Confessional, and answer our new question at the bottom. Continue Reading »

We try to stay open to all types of music, but when all is said and through punk rock is our main love. And when something brings as much joy as punk brings to our lives, we want to share it with those we consider close to us. So we conceived this mix to pay tribute to the different styles found under the punk rock umbrella. This is by no means an all encompassing list. It’s like using that little spoon at the ice cream shop to get a taste of the broad spectrum of punk rock. And we want you to feel more open to try punk rock so we didn’t pick an acquired taste like pralines and dick, but the more well liked flavors like triple chocolate fudge. So grab your spoon and try the 20 flavors we think you may enjoy. Continue Reading »

Welcome to the 2^nd Monday Confessional of 2010. Not a lot of Confessors this week – one actually – and we suspect the nature of the question might be a tad esoteric. We asked you: When you’re creating a new playlist, what song always seems to find its way onto every mix? When you make as many mixes as Hart and Dagger, you take for granted that not everyone thinks as heavily about music as we do, and might not even make mixes at all.

Case in point: When we wrote our “Sweatin’ to the CJS” mix, many of you espoused to not even making workout mixes at all and just put the player on shuffle which strikes us a completely alien concept. But we make a buttload of mixes, and since this week deals almost exclusively with this pursuit, despite our low participation, we’re here to share our mixing peccadilloes with you. So grab your Mp3 player, and let’s see what songs often find their way onto the CJS playlists. Continue Reading »

Welcome to the finest prognostication of the new year you can find anywhere on the web! It’s the 2nd Annual Cru Jones Society prediction article where we bring you our thoughts on movies, music, television, sports, politics, and a whole slew of other crap important to your life.

2009 was a wildly successful year for us as we grew from a mere 800 readers at the year’s beginning, to averaging more than 16,000 by year’s end. Dagger got married, Limon kicked ass and took names in the desert, and Hart lived the first full year of his life retail-free. We’re looking forward to an even bigger and better 2010, and to commemorate the occasion, we dredged up Senor Limon to chime in with his thoughts on 2010.

So pull up your favorite chair, settle in with a beverage, and prepare to digest nearly 5,000 words worth of insights from the CJS 2010 crystal ball. Away we go! Continue Reading »

Welcome to the first Confessional of the new year. And it’s a morbid one, so the Confessional title is certainly apropos. Choosing celebrity death is always a decidedly creepy task, so if there’s any place to do this and experience the requisite guilt of deciding which famous people are going to bite the dust this year, it’s definitely the Confessional.

For those of you new here, the Confessional is where we ask you a question, you respond via email, and we compare notes on the topic. It’s open to everyone, so don’t be shy and join us. This week’s question was Ghoul Pool ‘10: Which three celebrities will die in 2010? CJS Staff responds first and then we turn it over to our readers. Our new question is at the bottom.

Alright, time to spin the wheel of destiny! Let’s see who we all think is going to move to that big press junket in the sky. It’s time to play Ghoul Pool ‘10! Continue Reading »

Welcome back to the Monday Confessional where today we asked you the question: What are the things that you love and hate about the Christmas season? We’re guessing most of you were too busy last week either with your endless supply of merriment or your persistent staving off the desire to drink a quart of vodka and open a couple of veins in the bathtub to respond this week, but we forgive you. The holidays are crazy times for everyone, but despite the annual insanity, the Cru Jones Society must continue to forge ahead.

After this week’s responses, check out next week’s question because there will be a prize for whomever answers it best. We’ll also have a word about our schedule, and what to look for in the new year. But for now, let’s focus on the joys and miseries of the Christmas season. Continue Reading »